My apologies for not posting for a while – I have a good excuse, honest…
My regular readers, and my family and friends, all know that I’ve been the carer for my disabled partner for many years.
In the latter half of last year, my partner’s condition reached the point that I was totally unwilling to leave them alone. I already had a sitting service giving me a little time off, and I had been willing to leave my partner for an hour or so, providing we made certain preparations.
However, when my partner passed out after using the commode, I realised the time had come for me to become housebound.
A couple of weeks ago, my partner wouldn’t wake up.
I went into the room early in the morning with a cup of tea, and when my partner didn’t wake, I kindly decided that another half-hour wouldn’t hurt…
It was a diabetic attack, and it caused hypothermia, too. The ambulance ‘men’ were able to wake my partner with a glucose drip, but they were unable to stabilise the blood sugar level – so my partner went to hospital, cursing me every step of the way.
There were two ambulances, and they were at the house for two and a half hours.
The blood sugar and core body temperature were stabilised quickly, but other problems popped up, the major one being Pneumonia.
For two weeks, I had a lovely roller-coaster ride, as every time I enquired about my partners health, it was either very good, or very bad. And they alternated. I never got two the same on consecutive calls.
Family members managed to make arrangements to visit, thankfully: my partners daughter last Thursday, and brother and sister on Saturday. I got a call on Friday morning, however, that caused me to rush to the hospital hungry and dirty. I had planned to have breakfast, followed by a shower – I finally got some food at 9PM.
All day Friday I sat with my partner, coming home only because the poor dog had been locked in his cage all day.
Saturday, I was at the hospital early, with keys hidden outside the house for a friend to collect so they could keep the dog alive. My brother in law arrived, with his wife, and we spent all day wondering what on earth we could say to each other.
We never stopped talking, though. Strangely.
My partner’s sister managed to get in for ten minutes at the end of visiting hours, and promised to come back.
I then prepared myself for the night watch.
I had a chair next to the bed, and I pinched a couple of pillows for comfort, then I sat next to the bed holding my partners hand and stared at their face.
I drifted, I know I did. I nodded off. Many, many times.
Between 11PM and midnight I know I nodded off at least twenty times. And every time I opened my eyes, I would be looking at my partner, watching for the next breath.
At midnight, I opened my eyes again, and I knew the best thing to ever happen to me was over. My partner was gone.
That was midnight Saturday/Sunday. And apparently it is now Wednesday? If you tell me I’m wrong about that, I won’t argue…
I’m amazed at the love and support I’m seeing – even the dentist’s receptionist cried when I told her! My partner, it seems, was universally loved. Which is nice, but you have to ask how come I was the only one who looked after them, don’t you. (Sorry, that was wicked.)
Every day, I try to laugh at something. And that might get me into trouble… When the funeral director asked if there was any reason why a coroner should be involved, I replied ‘no, it was an untraceable poison.’
My partner has made me laugh, too. Yesterday, I dug out our wedding certificate – and realised that our Silver Wedding party was a year early!
(We always promised each other we’d get to Silver – and I suspect my partner was worried about making it, so ‘made a mistake’ for my sake.)
I’ll try to start making more regular posts, but… I’ve got to think about getting a job.
Can anybody think of an ideal occupation for an opinionated, principled, socially-challenged loner who is never wrong, and never afraid to point out how stupid the boss is?
I’d like to work from home, for the dog. I’d like to write, or have something involving computers – but I’d have to able to write what I wanted and thought, and I would refuse to touch Windows 8, or any task that involved adding strangers to a mailing list, website optimising, or pop-ups/cookies.
Should be easy enough. I’ll let you know tomorrow what I’ve been offered…